itsjustdust | Kunai the 18th: [Video/Action Vermillion]

[The feed clicked on, and for the first time in months everyone got a view of an orange and dark blue clad shinobi. His goggles were off his face, and his headband was nowhere on his head, likely because he was trying to scrub something off of the metal plate and had it in his lap, but otherwise he looked well enough, a bit bigger, lankier, but otherwise, fine.

Some people would be able to note he looked much more at peace too, under his irritation.]

Okay, enough is enough!

I mean it.

I fall out of contact for a few weeks, and what happens? Everyone up and decides to go home! Let me tell you something. I am so not thrilled by this.

So I don't care if we fought last we talked, or haven't spoken in months for no good reason, or anything like that. If you recognize me, come say hello to me because I would like to know who is left around here.

Okay?

This is stupid, and I apologize right now in a blanket 'yeah I get it, it's my fault too' for any and everything that might've kept us from talking.

But, seriously.

Hello and I want to talk to everyone, okay?

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[He looked thoughtful though, because he was pretty sure he got it.]

There's always something to learn, right? I think I get it. Thanks for the faith eh?

Right! At least I think so. It would be pretty -- bad or sad if we woke up one day, thinking we've learned everything we can. And you're welcome!

Wow, that would be pretty terrible. I mean, can you imagine how empty the world would seem?

[...] I see people with the "I've learned everything / There's nothing left for me. / I give up" and so on looks on their face often in my work, but that's what I get for working with prosthetic limbs. I've also met some, who've said that they have only one thing left to do in their life, but that doesn't have so much to do with my work.

[Also coming from a world where wars are regular? She's seen a lot, or heard at least.]

But yeah, the world would look pretty horrible if everyone suddenly went to that state.

[You're looking at someone who died in the middle of a war, or at least thought he did Winry, he knows.]

That's not the same at all. That's just... someone who broke, because they weren't handled properly when something went wrong. There's too many of those, especially from the other countries.

Then again, usually they roll it back around to rabid dangerous levels of fighting so...

[It's not like she knows that...!]

It's half the same! ...Still not exactly the same as just waking up and thinking that way, but i-it's not like people with missing limbs just decided to -- Okay, so I admit it's not the same, but the look in their eyes is still the same. I wouldn't want to see it in someone's eyes if they just woke up one morning and decided to give up for no reason or whatever reason. It's not like those don't exists in Amestris too. There's war somewhere going on all the time so sometimes even normal civil people go crazy, when they think there's no hope left.

I really admire people, who have the strength to move on from whatever situation, you know?

If civilians are going mad during a war, then that means that there's something wrong with the system of their country.

[His words were almost gentle then, and he gave her a wry smile.]

I was pretty sure I died in the middle of a war when I got here you know, and it's good people like you admire the ones who live through that stuff. They'd need that.

[...Something wrong with the sys...? Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah...]

Let's just say there's a lot wrong with the system of it, but we're not going into details about that.

[ . . . ]

[give her a moment to think what you just said.]

...you were pretty sure you died? I'm sorry --. So wait, when you say it like that, now you know that you won't die?

I still view it as me having been crushed to death, because otherwise I'd probably go a little crazy.

[He looked thoughtful at this.]

But yeah, pretty much.

I'm sorry... I -- I guess it's better to view it like that here then.

[Wow, but that sounds so cruel. But she doesn't want anyone going crazy.]

So, you're okay ...here?

Yep! You don't have to worry about me, and I'm sorry if I caused you to, I've just been doing a lot of thinking these last few months is all.

[Well that's a hell of a thing. Blake's not real good at handling anything sensitively, though, let alone that, so he goes for the first thing that pops into his head.]

I thought you said you weren't dead?

I'm not, but it feels like I was so... I'll just leave it as the significant marker.

Fine, I'm not even gonna get into it.

Sounds like all you get from back home is crazy bullshit bad news.

[Have a nice extended pause as he thinks about that.]

....

......

I really wish I could argue with that.

Right... It's been a while, I'd forgotten how quick you come back.

[She bites down on her lower lip for a second and sets down her sewing. Her mouth opens to say something else, but she shakes her head, cutting herself off before a single sound can escape. ~~Not like he can see right? Hurr hurr.~~]

Yeah...

If I were you, I'd quit asking.

[He watched her for a moment, then closed his eyes.]

Kushina-nee...

You don't actually want to talk to me, do you?

Thank you for answering anyway.

I did. [He huffed.]

I don't think the universe thinks so though.

[She closes her eyes a moment and sighs. Maybe she deserves to tell him this to his face. She goes to press the video button... And it's already recording. W h o o p s.]

I... I had to see if you were alright. It's still hard, y'know. I was gonna find out eventually, and I guess I keep hoping it's not true. Part... I mean... No, wait...

[And then she disconnects suddenly for a few minutes. Pls hold.]

[When she comes back on the private filter, the video's in her hand and she's alone on the inn roof, the buildings of Goldenrod serving as her backdrop.]

There's a part of me that does want to talk to you still. The same part that sees you as you are here. Whole and alive. Before anything happened. ...But I think the rest of me still needs some time.

[He watched her for a moment.]

You're the first person from home I actually... approached about that stuff, you know that, right? I didn't know-

[He halted a moment.]

It doesn't matter, I guess, does it? I'm going to keep learning things I don't like, and all I can do is keep making peace with them.

Who asked the universe's opinion? It can go take all its horoscopes and fortunetelling and screw itself.

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Kunai the 18th: [Video/Action Vermillion]

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