itsjustdust | Kunai the 18th: [Video/Action Vermillion]

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Kunai the 18th: [Video/Action Vermillion]

[The feed clicked on, and for the first time in months everyone got a view of an orange and dark blue clad shinobi. His goggles were off his face, and his headband was nowhere on his head, likely because he was trying to scrub something off of the metal plate and had it in his lap, but otherwise he looked well enough, a bit bigger, lankier, but otherwise, fine.

Some people would be able to note he looked much more at peace too, under his irritation.]

Okay, enough is enough!

I mean it.

I fall out of contact for a few weeks, and what happens? Everyone up and decides to go home! Let me tell you something. I am so not thrilled by this.

So I don't care if we fought last we talked, or haven't spoken in months for no good reason, or anything like that. If you recognize me, come say hello to me because I would like to know who is left around here.

Okay?

This is stupid, and I apologize right now in a blanket 'yeah I get it, it's my fault too' for any and everything that might've kept us from talking.

But, seriously.

Hello and I want to talk to everyone, okay?

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[He'd been hopeful, on some level, that she would call him... but the part of him that had been burned just a few too many times had been stomping it down. It meant that he was maybe a little too grateful, a little too intense for a moment when he first answered her reply.]

Kushina-nee...

[He cleared his throat, mentally throttling himself to not be a completely pathetic moron at her.]

I've had better months... but a lot worse ones too.

[Her heart ached a little at his address for her. Had she missed it? Maybe a little, but she doesn't say. Her eyes close for a moment, the needle in her hand pausing before continuing to slide in and out of the fabric.]

Are you gonna be alright?

[He managed to contain himself better with his next answer.]

I'll always be alright eventually. I spring back like that, you know, habit.

But... I know it's pointless to keep chewing on it, so no need to worry about that I guess.

Right... It's been a while, I'd forgotten how quick you come back.

[She bites down on her lower lip for a second and sets down her sewing. Her mouth opens to say something else, but she shakes her head, cutting herself off before a single sound can escape. ~~Not like he can see right? Hurr hurr.~~]

Yeah...

[He watched her for a moment, then closed his eyes.]

Kushina-nee...

You don't actually want to talk to me, do you?

Thank you for answering anyway.

[She closes her eyes a moment and sighs. Maybe she deserves to tell him this to his face. She goes to press the video button... And it's already recording. W h o o p s.]

I... I had to see if you were alright. It's still hard, y'know. I was gonna find out eventually, and I guess I keep hoping it's not true. Part... I mean... No, wait...

[And then she disconnects suddenly for a few minutes. Pls hold.]

[When she comes back on the private filter, the video's in her hand and she's alone on the inn roof, the buildings of Goldenrod serving as her backdrop.]

There's a part of me that does want to talk to you still. The same part that sees you as you are here. Whole and alive. Before anything happened. ...But I think the rest of me still needs some time.

[He watched her for a moment.]

You're the first person from home I actually... approached about that stuff, you know that, right? I didn't know-

[He halted a moment.]

It doesn't matter, I guess, does it? I'm going to keep learning things I don't like, and all I can do is keep making peace with them.

I... didn't, actually.

[She found herself about to agree with him, until she stopped for a second to listen to his words. Something in her tone takes a sharp turn into stern territory. Granted, her own reactions may have had some impact, but she knows she wasn't the one to force him into this mentality.]

Wait. That doesn't sound like the Obito I remember. Just accepting his fate like that? Accepting that he'll become a monster? If that's what you've been sitting on the last few months... Argh! I should've said something sooner! Damn it! You're being a dumbass! What the hell are you thinking?! So what if you're hearing things from Naruto and others about all kinds of horrible things you're apparently doing?! If you get to go home, maybe you can fix things knowing what you know!

[If Obito had been standing right next to her, she'd have taken a swing at his head while calling him a dumbass.]

Maybe I can, but is that going to fix anything here? Is it going to fix you, or Sensei, or even Rin? [He tied his Hitai-ate on and stood up, starting to pace, which showed flashes of leaves and sky and just general outside. He brought the gear closer to his face.]

Even if I fix it it won't make it better for you. It won't make that branch, that person never to have existed. It might, I dunno, change a timeline where I remember being here, but you're not from here, you're from there.

No matter how much I want to I can't wipe that away, not for any of you. It's there, it exists, and it's stupid, but what am I supposed to do?

[His voice had risen as he'd continued, working himself up until tears, but once he hit that point his voice got quieter, and he rubbed at his face.]

Huh?

I just get to deal with it because he isn't here and I am, so that means I get to shoulder it. Which means making peace with it, even if he's a stupid moron.

So what if it doesn't fix us?! Maybe we were gonna die at those points anyway, ya know! Something else coulda happened that couldn't be avoided! But the least you could do is try! Then if things turn out like they are now, you can at least say you gave it your damn best shot instead of just sitting there and taking it!

[Aaaaaaand there's a pause as she realizes how fast she's talking. But when she continues, it's not much slower.]

And that's exactly why you should try! You're still you in there! Not some monster or a complete moron. What you're doing right now... Remember all those times you told me about your family being a bunch of idiots to you? Did you take their bullying lying down? Well, did you?!

Yeah?! Well maybe if you really believed that you wouldn't have decided to have nothing to do with me!

[Whoops, volume going up again as he moved further away from anyone who could listen in.]

Maybe you wouldn't have given up on me for something I haven't even done! But you did!

[His voice got lower, intense as he shook his head hard.]

So don't you go pretending that it doesn't matter, when it obviously matters a whole hell of a lot to you.

[She's struck dumb for a few minutes. ~~How dare he call her out on her hypocrisy when she was trying to give him a pep talk... that was probably doomed to failure anyway.~~ But when she finally replies, she looks kinda peeved.]

You were the first to tell me anything about you being directly involved, y'know! Not Naruto, not Tsunade-hime, not even Minato. That was a whole lot of information to swallow all at once! In case you forgot, I had only been in this place for a month at the time. I had the Kyuubi ripped from me and I died right before I got here. I remembered you as you were when I got here. I remembered a great kid with a dream to become Hokage that I knew was possible! And then you were telling me you as good as killed me?! That you attacked our home and everyone in it?! That you started a war?! What would you have done in my place?! Tell me!

[The bright purple of her eyes may as well have been fire, the way they were blazing. And maybe they shone a little brighter, almost as if they were wet. Which... may or may not have been related to the way her voice cracked on "Tell me!"]

I'm trying to come to terms with it, but it's not easy, ya know! Maybe it looked like I gave up on you, but sometimes I thought about talking to you again. So I didn't do it, but for the entire time that we've been traveling in different places, not a single day went by that you didn't suddenly appear in my thoughts!

[He went silent for a beat, rubbing at his eyes, then gave his head a hard shake.]

I found out at Sasuke's birthday party. The one right after you got here. I was told by someone who that person I supposedly become in the future had personally killed Kushina-nee.

Before that I thought I'd died and I'd been more than happy knowing I'd died a good death, a worthy death for people I love. I didn't tell you when you asked right after that. I wanted to, but I was afraid you'd do exactly what you did, only I didn't think it would be as bad, because I didn't believe I'd ever hurt you.

But then you said I would, and threw a possibility in my face, and I don't want to understand it, okay. It's stupid and that plan is stupid and the whole thing is terrible. [He sank down to the grass, pressing his back against a tree, leaning over the gear and staring down into it, taking off his goggles and dropping them to the side.]

I don't want to be that person, and I tried to keep it to myself, but I thought even if it was terrible it would still be okay to tell you.

Edited 2013-10-09 04:37 (UTC)

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Kunai the 18th: [Video/Action Vermillion]

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